faery-lights - 2004-03-12
curiosekwe - 2004-02-10
splash-girl - 2004-01-09
shaynasanerd - 2003-12-24
poetgrl224 - 2003-11-30
2003-07-12 :: Ms. Lovejoy's Rules

Ms. Lovejoy's is CLOSED until further notice. Maybe forver. *sigh*

Rules, Grading, and Some General Advice.

There are tons of review sites out there for you, the diarist/weblogger, to chose from. In my not-so-humble opinion, 90% of these sites are crap-- they let any dope review diaries, have arbitrary or obscenely specific grading mechanisms, and/or are not unique in anyway (being mean isn't unique- it's just as cliched as being a pushover).

Ms. Lovejoy's Reviews is different. You are the student, we are the teachers. We've all met some basic educational qualifications to become reviewers-- and we're looking for specific qualities in your site. The point isn't to "judge" or berate you, but to guide you in the process of journaling. We're here to educate-- but like your sexy, young poetry teacher, not the dry-mouthed professor who puts you to sleep.

1- Ms. Lovejoy is the Creatrix here. Her word is law.
2-PUT OUR LINK UP. A text link is enough- eventually we'll offer images you can use.
3- Leave your request in the guestbook. Ask nicely.
4- You can request a reviewer…but I make no promises. If you have a previous relationship with any of the reviews, say so. Obviously, we’ll try to avoid personal conflicts, but shit happens.
5- You can be rereviewed, as long as you’ve made any major changes we suggested. Of course, people who haven’t gotten a first review will be given attention first.
6- If you really hate your review, and ask me nicely enough, I’ll take it down
7- No locked diaries.
8- We accept all diaries and weblogs (diaryland, blogspot, whatever).
9- Please keep in mind the spirit of Ms. Lovejoy's-- if you can't take honest, constructive criticism, you're in the wrong place.

We try very hard to be objective here. We look at your diary as a whole-- including any guestbook, links, profile—the whole package.
Style refers to all the external trappings of your diary—layout, colors, organization, etc. Dland templates are beyond sad, and don’t go changing your layout mid-review. We're looking for good links, neatness, easy of movement, and (the extremely subjective) aesthetic appeal.
Substance is, obviously, your writing, as well as anything you've linked to. We expect quality writing, including grammar and spelling. We’re open to any kind of diary—about your personal life, dreams, diet, whatever. Regardless, it had better be entertaining. We're reviewing PUBLIC diaries, here-- diaries to be read by an audience of strangers. It would serve you well to keep that in mind.
Suggestions are…well, just that. Don’t ask for a review if you’re not willing to take them…that’s just wasting our time! In general, there are a few things I'd like to suggest universally:
-Please have biography or About Me page that's easy to find. It gives the reader some context for your writing.
-Tell stories. Don't list your day's itinerary.
-Don't be afraid to be FUNNY. The best diaries, even when dealing with serious subjects, also make you laugh.
-Anytime you think, "No, this is too bizarre to write about," stop yourself and write about it.
-If you write about your friends or family a lot, have a cast list. But remember, no one cares about gossip if they don't know the victim.

Your grade: I doubt anyone will get an A+, so don’t hold your breath. An “A” has lots of entries (100 minimum) and near perfect everything else. A “B” is a good start, but wouldn’t read it regularly without changes. “C” is acceptable but lacks a crucial element. “D” is terribly unpleasant to read, and needs a number of serious modifications. “F” is for pEePle wwho RiTe liKe ThIs.

Good luck everybody! And remember…that’s Ms. Lovejoy to you.