Style
You open the diary and you see gigantic letters that spell out "I got my philosophy..." A nice catcher, kind of like a book that begins "I only fucked my sister twice, the first time was for fun, the second time was to spite all morality." That caught my attention. There are a shitload of links to the left, so many that I felt like an attempt to look through them all would just be an exercise in futility. Something strange about all those links is that some of them are labelled "People I know". Why would they be on the template and not just in the profile? The background color is white, which I hear is hell on the eyes of the reader, not a very considerate color choice and probably a lie told to me by some whackjob physicist. But after reading a bunch of entries I did feel somewhat head ached. To the right you will notice a "Song De Jour", which seems to never change, it is constantly stuck on Sheryl Crow. It is almost like a metaphor for the author's life, but she has a man, so what is the deal? She is a part of three diary rings: The Write Club, The Fight club, and the Naughty Girl Scout Ring. I think this moderate amount of ring linking is fairly acceptable. Throughout the diary you will notice a lot of misspelling, lack of capitalization, and grammatical errors. Grade: C, common but cluttered and work on that capitalization and grammar.
Substance
So poetgrl224 is a high school girl with a fantastic vocabulary, a reoccuring desire to be skinnier, and huge tits. She has a problem that people constantly judge her by the size of her breasts, the entries that she talks about this issue are funny and, I feel, representative of her actual situation in the world. Unlike most teenagers she seems to be on good terms with her parents and they treat her well, a very interesting development because now she can talk about other things. Other things like the various social relationships she has and her boyfriend. Normally, I read every entry the diarist has written, but 811 entries is a fucking shitload. So I read the first hundred entries, about forty entries in the middle and all the entries from November. I say this because I might have missed something that would be important to note.
Remember that catchy title? Well, where the hell is your philosophy? Every page advertises philosophy, but instead we get interesting thoughts and definite feeling. Where is it that you lay down the Socratic method like no one has every tried? Where do you deny all that is Nietzsche and endorse those thoughts of Aquinas that fit with your belief? Maybe below the banner you should put "not packaged as advertised."
The poetgrl224, soon to be woman, is very in control or does not tell us those moments that she does not feel out of control. The idea of organization and control seems to be an implied theme, never center stage, but always there working in mysterious ways. Grade: B-, there are a lot of one sentence entries and sometimes nothing interesting, but there are a whole mess of good ones.
Suggestions
You have gotten progressively better in speling with each entry, so don't lose it. Remember capitalizing is the rule not a choice. Reconsider why you have all your friends listed on your template and your profile. Is the song of the day always Sheryl Crow?
C+
You have a good thing happening here, but tell us more about your thoughts.
